December Traditions

Now that December is here, I've realized that many of our traditions start around Thanksgiving and keep us busy through the New Year.  Now that we have a child, we have added even more.  It's hard not to add things, as she is in that toddler stage, so innocent and fascinated by everything.  Working full time complicates this even further, because most of our activities end up squeezed into the weekends.  Having hockey season tickets gives me even less free time, though I do love it.  Thank goodness my team only has three home games this month! 

I am starting to realize that all of these things are why our house gets decorated for Christmas around December 23rd each year. 

Hmm.

But what do we cut out?  It's hard to trim anything, since most of these are A) fun and B) time spent with family or close friends. 

This Saturday we have two events planned.  The first one is new, a holiday party for the kids in daycare at my company, complete with Santa.  This should be a lot of fun, as my daughter's little friends will all be there and they all gaze in wonder at Christmas lights and Santa.

Then in the evening, we go to a Dickens festival in a town about an hour from home.  One of my closest friends lives right on the main street and a group of three of us attend this quaint little street fair no matter the weather.  We're like the postal service when it comes to this festival.  And we have seen all kinds of weather at this one.  We people watch, browse the booths, avoid the stilt-walkers and listen to carolers, and check out the live nativity scene while we wait for Santa to roll into town.  We don't always make it that long, sometimes a hot dinner in a warm place is too appealing to hold out on.  Then we adjourn to my friend's apartment to eat Harry and David Moose Munch and watch Harry Potter movies on ABC Family.  The evening comes to an end when one of us succumbs to our allergy to the cat.  One of the things I love about this outing is that my daughter fits into it seamlessly, and hopefully she will continue to love going to the festival with the girls as she gets older.

Sunday will be spent recovering from running all over the state on Saturday.  Hopefully this will also be an opportunity to identify where the Christmas tree will go this year and get that spot cleared out.  We always seem to have home improvement projects going on that impact exactly where we had planned to put the tree, requiring a last minute change of plans and hoping that the tree will fit somewhere else.

Upcoming events include:  adopting a family for Christmas and shopping/wrapping, photo with Santa, a cookie swap with friends, children's Christmas party at the firehouse, adult Christmas party at the firehouse,  our town's Christmas tree lighting, Santa ride on the firetruck to visit neighborhood children on Christmas Eve, and other things I am certainly forgetting. 

These events are on top of: decorating our home; shopping for family, friends, co-workers, teachers; planning, potentially hosting and traveling to various family celebrations of the holiday (we have at least three each year, sometimes four); off-site meetings for work; my husband's crazy work schedule and recertification courses; completing my mandatory continuing education by December 31; and of course, continuing to feed my family a healthy dinner each night and make sure everyone has clean clothes each day.

I'm going to take things one day at a time and shoot for accomplishing one thing each day...or couple of days.  On the upside, my daughter is still young enough that I can get away with being a little bit of a disorganized mess...she won't remember it.  Yet.  Now is the time to work out the kinks and get the hang of making Christmas events at home as much or more of a priority as the ones out. 

I can do this. 

Risk Versus Reward: Is It Worth It To Change Jobs Now?

I am definitely a creature of habit. 

At the same time, I like a good challenge. 

It's a quandary, for sure.  I have been in my current job for four years and in this department for seven years.  In many ways, I am ready for a change.  But there are thoughts that are holding me back from opening the door to a new job, a new challenge. 

I want to stay with the company that I currently work for.  Which should be possible, as it is a huge company with a variety of different operations within a reasonable commute from my home.  I need to keep my benefits, especially health benefits.  I would be able to keep DD in her daycare, with her friends.  This is good for both of us, she gets to stay with her friends, I get peace of mind.  At a premium price.  But that's a topic for another time. 

There are surprisingly few job opportunities at my level for a licensed attorney outside of the formal legal department.  And the reason I'm not looking for a job in the legal department because they won't hire me.  Despite all the internal experience I have, I don't have five to ten years of experience in a big law firm, so they won't consider me for an attorney position.  I'm okay with this.  I've never had an interest in working eighty-hour-or-longer weeks.  If I were, I would have that big firm experience they want.  Work life balance was important to me even before DD was born. 

I also find it frustrating that I can't get hired in an area that I technically don't have experience in, but I do have the skills to learn the job and excel at it. I know the company, and I know the business. 

How am I supposed to gain experience in an area if no one will give me a chance to prove that I can do it?  Conversely, how do I convince someone to hire me if I don't have the exact, minute experience that they are requiring? 

Let's put those questions aside for a moment.  I'm also going to put aside the fact that in this economy, there is more competition for fewer jobs, with more qualified applicants than ever before.  Let's focus on why I am ambivalent about that next opportunity.  Every now and then, an opportunity that I would have jumped at in the past comes across my desk.  I should jump at it now, right?  I hesitate every time.  I'm psyching myself right out of the job market.  Questions immediately start running through my head.  I'm going to tackle these one at a time in hopes of putting them to rest forever.  If I can't, maybe someone can comment and tell me how I can look at it differently. 

What if I don't like the boss/the management style?

There are variations on this one, but they all really boil down to this. It's not like I haven't dealt with change in this area before.  In a two year stretch, I had eight different bosses.  Yes, eight.  In. Two. Years.  And believe it or not, it's actually gotten worse since then.  I lost count at some point, partially because of my maternity leave.  So it's in the range of twelve in three or four years.  I haven't reported into the same boss for more than five months at a time due to reorganizations and bosses moving to new positions. There have been many different management styles in that time.  I should be used to change.  Heck, I might even gain more stability.  Not sure why this is such an issue for me.

What if there is no flexibility/less flexibility than my current job?

My company offers a great many flexibility options.  However, it is the discretion of each individual manager as to whether one can take advantage of them.  In the past I have requested job sharing, reducing my hours to part-time or working from home a set day or two per week.  All of these requests for formal flexibility have been denied.  There is informal flexibility that I can take advantage of on a less regular basis.  Things like working from home on occasion, coming in later and leaving later as opposed to a strict 9-5, or going to doctor's appointments during the day.  I need to turn around my thinking on this one - my question should be: what if there is a lot more flexibility and I am missing out on a great opportunity for a job I would love that would fit well with my life outside of work?

What if I don't like the work?

I don't really have an answer for this one.  I like what I do now, and I am an expert in the subject matter, but it's not an area I can come back to if I move on.  The only answer I can come up with is that if I don't like it, I can always look for another opportunity after the commitment time has expired.  Wouldn't it be great if you could test drive a job?

What if I don't mesh with the other people on the team?

I've got nothing on this one.

Do I really want to be a people manager again?

Don't get me wrong, I loved the people on my team, and I really enjoyed helping them to grow.  The issue is really more with workload.  Being a people manager is like having a job and a half for the same pay as someone at the same level who doesn't manage people.  And there is a lot of paperwork involved, to the extent that it is overwhelming.  If I had an administrative assistant to help with this, different story.  But that's not part of the deal. 

People management also potentially means additional folks keeping tabs on comings and goings.  I work out my schedule with my manager.  I am flexible with those who work for me and my philosophy is, worry about yourself, not about your neighbor (or your manager).  If someone isn't pulling their weight, there will be consequences. Not everyone shares this same philosophy and some are just tattle tales.  Not sure I am ready to deal with this again.  It's a question of whether the positives outweigh the negatives, and I just don't know if they do. 

What if the commute turns out to be horrible?

I am so spoiled when it comes to commuting.  I live five miles from my office.  I believe there are three traffic lights.  This is not to say that I haven't paid my dues.  I spent several years with a commute that took an hour or more to go the ten miles to the office.  The same drive takes fifteen minutes when it isn't rush hour.  I hate that.  The problem is that some of the other offices my company has would involve that exact same commute.  I just don't think I can deal with it. 

Why can't I find a job share or a part time job at my current level?

This is my own personal holy grail.  I hear that it exists, even within my company.  I wonder why these arrangements aren't more common, especially the job share.  Is it just me, or doesn't it seem like a win-win situation?  It would cost the company less financially and give them two employees who are more motivated, more engaged and more productive?  Isn't this the definition of "do more with less"?

When it comes down to it, I need to push myself to change.  So I am going to just grit my teeth, close my eyes, hit submit, and say a little prayer that I find the right job for me.  Wish me luck!!

Is Work Life Balance a Myth?

Ever since the birth of my daughter almost 2 years ago, I am constantly trying to find work life balance.  Some days it's to the extent that if I had the money, I would hire a life coach, because I feel like I'm never going to figure it out.  Today I spotted this article about how companies prefer employees that have no life outside of work.  I am disappointed, but not surprised because this is my life right now.  My company has a great reputation for work life balance and being family friendly, but the day to day reality is dependent upon your direct manager.  I have had a number of different bosses over the last 5 years, and they have varied greatly in management style.  One of the few consistencies among them is that they all talk the talk when it comes to flexibility but do not walk the walk.  No one wants to set precedent.  I've sought job shares or part-time opportunities at my current employer, but what it boils down to is that if you are at the manager level or above, those opportunities don't really exist.  I've made realistic proposals based on solid business cases and have been shot down repeatedly.  The sad thing is that I loved my job and was very motivated to do it well.  The constant battles over flexibility that I've lost have created what I would think is the least desirable scenario for an employer.  I am completely frustrated and unmotivated now.  In the past I was willing to log in and complete work tasks outside of business hours.  I am never going to do that again.  When I leave work, I don't give it another thought until I return to the office in the morning.  If I am not respected and the work I produce is not valued, then there is no reason for me to go above and beyond.  The job share proposals I've done would save the company money and create better continuity of service while creating jobs in a terrible economy.  I'm failing to see the downside.  It's a win-win!

This was bound to become an issue.  The technology that we have access to was either going to create great opportunities for work life balance or it was going to become a leash that all but those without lives were going to be strangled by.  Blackberries, laptops and smart phones should create a workplace that doesn't require a physical office or cube.  I know there are a few very successful businesses that have changed their business model so that they now lease or own small offices that allow their employees a place to work or hold meetings on an as needed basis.  Unfortunately, most of the corporate world is too much of a dinosaur to be able to shift that way.  It's a shame because I think they could save a lot of money. Not to mention that it is a "green" way to do business.  Another thing corporate America seems to want to say they do without having to follow through.

I also think this is an example of a few ruining it for the rest of us.  I know more people who are in search of work life balance than have no lives outside work.  My friends who are married to the job aren't in love with their jobs though.  They want more in their personal lives.  Which tells me that neither situation is ideal...a common theme in my life is that all things in moderation, nothing to excess is more than just a maxim, it's a highly desirable way of life.  The happiest people I know are those who have truly flexible job situations without penalties behind the scenes.  I know there is something better out there for me, I just seem to be having trouble finding it on my own.  Someday I'll find it.

Come on, Irene!

Hurricane Irene passed by almost a week ago, but she is still wreaking havoc on my daily routine!  I mentioned in an earlier post that we were very fortunate and did not experience any major damage or flooding at our home.  However, we do live near a large river that refuses to stay inside its banks in large thunderstorms, so we knew that the hurricane would be a problem in that respect.  Usually it just makes it hard to get to the next town for a few days, but this time we were personally impacted.  I got a call last Monday night that our daycare was flooded.  It never occurred to me that it might be, because although it is right by the river, it's elevated.  I work for a large company, and the daycare is an on-campus facility run by a national chain.  So the upside is that they were able to shift all staff and operations to another facility until repairs are completed.  The downside is the location of that facility.  It's one of those deals where it is less than 10 miles away, but in rush hour it takes an hour and a half or two hours to get there and back.  I am having a lot of trouble adjusting to that.

We are not morning people.  Not one of us.  So having to move up the morning routine an hour has been really fun.  Or not.  I will also never understand why it is that no matter what time I leave the house, something happens along the way, and I always get there at the same time.  Does time expand to fill the extra half hour I left myself to get there?  Why?  What is that about?  Did time know that I was on jury duty and so did not have ANY flexibility in my schedule last week?

On the upside, I was able to obtain work space closer to the alternate care location, so the commute should be cut in half.  It's still the wrong direction to travel in rush hour.  More happy news is that if our great state provides a passing grade on a site visit later this week, the facility may reopen next Monday.  Hooray!  Add this to the list of things I never thought I would get excited about!

Here's hoping this week goes more smoothly!