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Monday, November 28, 2011

My Crazy Thanksgiving Weekend!

Hope that you all had a Happy Thanksgiving!  I have a great deal to be thankful for, and gave that quite a bit of thought over the long holiday weekend.  And I do mean long. 

Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays, and I look forward to it every year.  We alternate spending Thanksgiving with my family and my husband's family.  My brother-in-law and his wife host DH's extended family every other year (they have the same rotation that we do), and my sister-in-law is super organized and a great cook.  Everyone brings something - most are assigned a dessert, or appetizer, or beverages.  Our assignment?  We bring the turkey.  I thought this would be really tough the first year we did it, but we've got it down now, and it gets rave reviews every time.  Never did I dream I would cook a bird that I then had to transport 45 minutes, keeping him hot along the way.  But I digress.  This year it was my family's turn, so no turkey transport this year. 

My DH works seven on, seven off nights, which means that he is off every other week.  There are no holidays off due to the nature of his work.  This year, unfortunately, he was on for Thanksgiving, which meant that he wasn't able to join us to celebrate Thanksgiving at my aunt's house, an hour and a half from our home. Usually Thanksgiving weekend is a simple thing.  We go to the home of the family member hosting, hang out, each too much, watch football or maybe It's a Wonderful Life and drive home and spend the rest of the weekend recovering and getting stuff done around our house and yard.  This year was much more involved than that. 

DD turned two last week, and my in-laws insisted on coming up for her birthday, despite the fact that we didn't want to have a party this year because of crazy schedules and the holiday. Not one to give them their way without being a little bit of a brat, I declared that fair is fair and invited my parents up as well.  My BIL and niece joined us as well.  My mom made a cake (thank you!  It was a big help, and very tasty!), and she also made my kitchen smell delicious by baking pies for the next day while I cleaned up my house before the rest of our visitors arrived.  We are not capable of having only one thing go on at a time, so of course we were also awaiting the delivery of a new freezer for the garage.  Which arrived damaged.  Which reminds me that I need to make sure we follow up with the place we bought it from.  (Adding to my to-do list.  Okay, done.)  Visitors arrived, freezer arrived, we went out to dinner, I didn't kill anyone, it was a successful visit.  We all went to bed tired. 

Thursday, I had our two year old solo for the trip to my aunt's house, which is usually no big deal.  This year, however, as soon as we got there, she looked at me and said, "Tummy huwts" and tossed her cookies.  Poor baby. She then proceeded to get sick a couple more times and was just generally under the weather.  Fortunately, we had extra clothes because we were spending the night at my parents house.  My overpacking tendency definitely came in handy.  DD perked up after almost everyone had left and started eating almost everything she could get her hands on. 

We were able to sleep in on Friday (thank goodness!) and then we headed to the city for the nhl game that we had tickets for.  After the game we got dinner at the diner and then headed home to collapse relax.  Then Sunday it was back down for my niece's christening.  It was a very nice day, though very long. 

I thought I was in the clear, but Sunday night I was stricken with the bug that hit DD on Thanksgiving day.  I haven't been that sick in a very long time.  I would have had this post up earlier, but I slept through Monday and couldn't look at the computer on Tuesday.  Much better today.

Even with the marathon that was this holiday weekend, Thanksgiving is still one of my favorite holidays.  It isn't like it used to be, when I was younger and didn't have a kid.  I don't always get to talk to everyone that I want to, but they understand.  I know that. 

I am thankful that I have my family.  I'm thankful that we are, for the most part, healthy. I'm thankful that I get to see my family on holidays.  While it's no fun when my husband has to work on holidays, I'm thankful that he has a job.  I could go on, but I think you get the idea.  I have a lot to be thankful for.  I hope that you do too, and that you had a Happy Thanksgiving spent with those near and dear to you. 

Now the holiday season has begun, it doesn't slow down until after the new year.  Let the craziness begin!

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Risk Versus Reward: Is It Worth It To Change Jobs Now?

I am definitely a creature of habit. 

At the same time, I like a good challenge. 

It's a quandary, for sure.  I have been in my current job for four years and in this department for seven years.  In many ways, I am ready for a change.  But there are thoughts that are holding me back from opening the door to a new job, a new challenge. 

I want to stay with the company that I currently work for.  Which should be possible, as it is a huge company with a variety of different operations within a reasonable commute from my home.  I need to keep my benefits, especially health benefits.  I would be able to keep DD in her daycare, with her friends.  This is good for both of us, she gets to stay with her friends, I get peace of mind.  At a premium price.  But that's a topic for another time. 

There are surprisingly few job opportunities at my level for a licensed attorney outside of the formal legal department.  And the reason I'm not looking for a job in the legal department because they won't hire me.  Despite all the internal experience I have, I don't have five to ten years of experience in a big law firm, so they won't consider me for an attorney position.  I'm okay with this.  I've never had an interest in working eighty-hour-or-longer weeks.  If I were, I would have that big firm experience they want.  Work life balance was important to me even before DD was born. 

I also find it frustrating that I can't get hired in an area that I technically don't have experience in, but I do have the skills to learn the job and excel at it. I know the company, and I know the business. 

How am I supposed to gain experience in an area if no one will give me a chance to prove that I can do it?  Conversely, how do I convince someone to hire me if I don't have the exact, minute experience that they are requiring? 

Let's put those questions aside for a moment.  I'm also going to put aside the fact that in this economy, there is more competition for fewer jobs, with more qualified applicants than ever before.  Let's focus on why I am ambivalent about that next opportunity.  Every now and then, an opportunity that I would have jumped at in the past comes across my desk.  I should jump at it now, right?  I hesitate every time.  I'm psyching myself right out of the job market.  Questions immediately start running through my head.  I'm going to tackle these one at a time in hopes of putting them to rest forever.  If I can't, maybe someone can comment and tell me how I can look at it differently. 

What if I don't like the boss/the management style?

There are variations on this one, but they all really boil down to this. It's not like I haven't dealt with change in this area before.  In a two year stretch, I had eight different bosses.  Yes, eight.  In. Two. Years.  And believe it or not, it's actually gotten worse since then.  I lost count at some point, partially because of my maternity leave.  So it's in the range of twelve in three or four years.  I haven't reported into the same boss for more than five months at a time due to reorganizations and bosses moving to new positions. There have been many different management styles in that time.  I should be used to change.  Heck, I might even gain more stability.  Not sure why this is such an issue for me.

What if there is no flexibility/less flexibility than my current job?

My company offers a great many flexibility options.  However, it is the discretion of each individual manager as to whether one can take advantage of them.  In the past I have requested job sharing, reducing my hours to part-time or working from home a set day or two per week.  All of these requests for formal flexibility have been denied.  There is informal flexibility that I can take advantage of on a less regular basis.  Things like working from home on occasion, coming in later and leaving later as opposed to a strict 9-5, or going to doctor's appointments during the day.  I need to turn around my thinking on this one - my question should be: what if there is a lot more flexibility and I am missing out on a great opportunity for a job I would love that would fit well with my life outside of work?

What if I don't like the work?

I don't really have an answer for this one.  I like what I do now, and I am an expert in the subject matter, but it's not an area I can come back to if I move on.  The only answer I can come up with is that if I don't like it, I can always look for another opportunity after the commitment time has expired.  Wouldn't it be great if you could test drive a job?

What if I don't mesh with the other people on the team?

I've got nothing on this one.

Do I really want to be a people manager again?

Don't get me wrong, I loved the people on my team, and I really enjoyed helping them to grow.  The issue is really more with workload.  Being a people manager is like having a job and a half for the same pay as someone at the same level who doesn't manage people.  And there is a lot of paperwork involved, to the extent that it is overwhelming.  If I had an administrative assistant to help with this, different story.  But that's not part of the deal. 

People management also potentially means additional folks keeping tabs on comings and goings.  I work out my schedule with my manager.  I am flexible with those who work for me and my philosophy is, worry about yourself, not about your neighbor (or your manager).  If someone isn't pulling their weight, there will be consequences. Not everyone shares this same philosophy and some are just tattle tales.  Not sure I am ready to deal with this again.  It's a question of whether the positives outweigh the negatives, and I just don't know if they do. 

What if the commute turns out to be horrible?

I am so spoiled when it comes to commuting.  I live five miles from my office.  I believe there are three traffic lights.  This is not to say that I haven't paid my dues.  I spent several years with a commute that took an hour or more to go the ten miles to the office.  The same drive takes fifteen minutes when it isn't rush hour.  I hate that.  The problem is that some of the other offices my company has would involve that exact same commute.  I just don't think I can deal with it. 

Why can't I find a job share or a part time job at my current level?

This is my own personal holy grail.  I hear that it exists, even within my company.  I wonder why these arrangements aren't more common, especially the job share.  Is it just me, or doesn't it seem like a win-win situation?  It would cost the company less financially and give them two employees who are more motivated, more engaged and more productive?  Isn't this the definition of "do more with less"?

When it comes down to it, I need to push myself to change.  So I am going to just grit my teeth, close my eyes, hit submit, and say a little prayer that I find the right job for me.  Wish me luck!!

Monday, November 14, 2011

Dancing Muppets and Childhood Muppet Memories

I love the Muppets.  I have loved them for as long as I can remember.  There were only a few shows I can remember my family watching all together.  MacGyver and The Muppet Show are two that really stand out.  Looking back, I realize that we didn't watch that much tv.  We heard the words, "Go outside and play" on a regular basis.  My peanut isn't old enough for that yet, but it has been pretty easy to limit her tv consumption.  She is just a busy little bee, for the most part she would rather play and run around than sit and watch tv.  Which is just fine with me! Recently she has started to show interest in certain things on tv, mainly Cinderella.  She can also identify Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck and Miss Piggy.  She still calls Kermit "Frog".  She is turning two, and generally only watches 5-15 minutes of tv at a time.  I will watch Danicing with the Stars when she's around, as it is generally good clean fun.  She loves music and will dance along to the fast numbers.  Of course, she also thinks that all the female dancers are Cinderella.  I watch it on our DVR, and last week it took me a long time to get through it, I was watching it in 15 - 30 minute chunks.  (side note - I like to DVR this one because I can fast forward through most of the filler content, especially in the results show).  Peanut has also seen a few episodes of the Muppet Show on dvd, and is captivated by Miss Piggy right now.  Last week, she kept asking, "Piggy, Dancin'?" She made it very clear that she wanted Miss Piggy to appear on Dancing with the Stars.  I kept trying to explain that they were on two separate shows and that I do not have the magical powers necessary to make Miss Piggy appear on DWTS.  She shook her head at me each time and repeated, "Miss Piggy, Dancin'!" On Friday, I heard a teaser for this week's DWTS - and the Muppets are going to be on DWTS this week!  I must admit, I'm a little freaked out by this - she fished her wish!  Though it shouldn't be too surprising, since the movie comes out this week and ABC is a Disney property.  Yet the thought never crossed my mind.  Maybe my two year old has a future in marketing, as she drew this logical conclusion with no prompting.  There is no way she saw an ad for it or heard anything about it before the teaser I heard.  She just wanted to see Miss Piggy on DWTS.  Two of her favorite things, joined together.  It sounds like the Muppets will be dancing to a new song from the movie.  I am like a little kid, I can't wait to see it!

On the subject of The Muppets (the movie), I am hoping it lives up to the hype.  I did enjoy Muppets from Space, but for the most part, the Muppets have really just not been the same for me since Jim Henson passed away.  I am optimistic that this movie will bring a return to the Muppets I knew and loved growing up.  Now I just have to find a way to sneak out of my house to see it in the theater...I'm guessing other moviegoers wouldn't want to sit next to a very active two year old. 

Friday, November 11, 2011

Smile! Awkward School Photos

The daycare that my daughter attends ranges from infant all the way up through Kindergarten.  Perhaps for this reason, each fall they have the equivalent of school photos.  The photographic studio they used this year is the same company that took many of my school photos when I was growing up.  Being mother of the year, I forgot that it was picture day until I walked into the classroom at drop off and saw how cute all the other kids looked.  My poor child was in need of a haircut or at least pigtails and still had some of her breakfast on her face.  On the upside, she was at least wearing a cute outfit...but only because the play clothes I had planned on for that day were too small.  Since they had seen better days, it was fortunate that they were more than a smidge too small, because I have been known to send her in clothes that are on the cusp.  Clothes are expensive!  But I digress.  I wiped her face (I would have done this anyway, regardless of photos, I swear!) and her teachers very kindly let me know that she could get retakes the very next day, as the photographer would still be on-site.  At pick up, I learned that my little momma did her best that day to get her friends to smile for their photos. The next day we arrived promptly, nicely dressed and with her hair combed into pigtails.  She very graciously allowed me to put the pigtails in that morning, which is not the norm.  Then she refused to smile for her photos.  Her teacher was jumping around like crazy in the background trying to get her to crack a smile for even a split second.  (Her teacher is the best, love her!  It must have been hysterical watching her jump around.)

As a result of all this, I was kind kind of anxiously awaiting the proofs.  We got them last night.  There are two sets.  In the ones where her hair is a little goofy (so clearly in need of a trim!), she has an angelic smile.  In the ones where she is spiffed up, she is making faces.  One has a hint of a smile.  So I am in a quandary as to whether to buy any of them! 

Seeing the proofs really took me back to my own school photos.  I remember having them taken, thinking that I looked fine.  Then getting the proofs and seeing that my hair was sticking up or my collar was pointing in a funky direction or I was caught mid blink.  I still think those photographers should have fixed the obvious and simple things.  Like collars.  Or they should have at least mentioned it and given me a chance to quickly fix it myself.  I would say 85% of my school pictures were cringe-worthy, and I sincerely believe that there are others who feel the same way.  I hope, for my daughter's sake, that digital photography has eliminated at least some of these issues, like the eyes half mast or mid-sneeze photos.  For the other things, like her mother forgetting it was picture day when she was a toddler, well, I guess she's out of luck.  I never would have thought that this would start so early, at least I was five before I had my first school photo.  I feel a little bad that there is the potential for more of these embarrassing photos for my daughter than there were for me.  Oh well...let the awkward school photos begin!

Monday, November 7, 2011

I'm All A - Twitter - About Finding a Profile Pic

I've been on Twitter for a few weeks now, and I love it.  So many interesting people and great links, I have to find time to talk to them and read them all.  It's expanded my horizons in a big way.  The downside is that I really believe I'm letting my vanity impede my full entry into the Twitterverse...I can't find a picture of myself that I like enough to add to my profile as my avatar.  Thus, I have been operating with the dreaded egghead for way too long!  It is pretty clear that people don't trust you if you don't have a photo.  And I can understand it, I'm usually the same way.  I just never thought it would be so hard to come up with one.  It was only after I started trying to find a profile pic that I realized that I haven't been photographed alone in several years.  All my photos are focused on my daughter, I tend to be looking at her or I'm making a really goofy face, caught unprepared.  Also, I'm generally the one behind the camera taking the pictures, so I'm not in many at all. This is something that I need to work on, as I really don't want my daughter to grow up and wonder why I'm not in any photos from her childhood.  I'm sure I am not the only one in this boat, though I would feel much better about this if others would chime in and confirm it!  I know I need to just take a picture and get it up there, but I also want to put my best foot forward.  So I keep telling myself I'll do it after I get my hair colored and cut.  Or that I need to do it on a day when I'm wearing makeup - I almost never wear makeup even though I am at the point where I really need to.  Red blotchiness is not pretty!  And it certainly doesn't photograph well.  As you can imagine, the excuses go on and on and on...

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Halloween Hangover & Recap

From all the sugar consumed yesterday!  Not getting many trick or treaters means lots of candy left over.  I know I should buy candy I don't like, but then I feel like I've wasted money.  It's a personal Catch 22.  I was sitting in a four hour long meeting this morning regretting not having brought the candy to work with me.  I missed a golden opportunity to unload the leftover candy and sugar up an otherwise uneventful meeting. 

I'm tired, but all the running around was worth it.  DD loved trick or treating.  What's not to love?  I hadn't been trick or treating since I was a teenager, but I enjoyed it as much this year as I did back then.  At first she was happy just to be putting her costume on and going for a ride in the stroller.  I'm not sure why the stroller is a novelty to her now, but I'm happy it is because it means I don't have to carry her when she decides she doesn't want to walk anymore.  She's getting heavy! Then she realized that each house was giving her chocolate, her favorite food.  She quickly figured out that if she said, "more, pease!" that most of the kind people giving out candy would give her more.  "Tank you!"  She started shopping through her goody bag about five houses in, quickly identifying the chocolate and requesting, "Open, pease!" in a happy little singsong.  Fortunately, we had anticipated this and had a little bag of m&ms that could be meted out one at a time every few houses.  When she's bigger we will make clear the "no eating the candy until we get home" rule.  For now, she's two.  She will have forgotten all about the m&ms by next year.  And I have hidden her candy from this year, to be dispensed gradually.  I had a nightmare about finding her in the living room with wrappers strewn around her, giggling and bouncing off the walls for hours.  I'm just not ready for that yet. 

I suspect that I will not be allowed to put her costume away.  She has asked to wear it for the last 4 days in a row.  I see a project for mommy in the not so distant future...starting a dress up box.  I should probably get a toybox for the rest of her toys first, should add both to my to-do list.  Check. 

I think DH really enjoyed trick or treating too.  Pretty sure he was just humoring me initially, but he had a good time.  I got him a "costume" at the dollar store - glasses with a nose and mustache attached.  I thought he would mock me but figured it was worth $1 to find out.  Surprisingly, he did not mock and did wear them.  He even rigged them up to make them fit him!  Woohoo!  I love Halloween, so i am disappointed when he is grinchy about it.  I think it helped that we went trick or treating with our next door neighbors and their three kids, and that he saw a few other dads out.  The plan for next year is to hit a couple key houses on our street and then head over a couple blocks to an area with sidewalks and houses that are closer together.  Now I just need three costume ideas for next year...